'it ain't easy being cheesy'

Here is one I'm only messing around with. just one word of inspiration, beauty.

I have seen

You remind me of beauty, you remind me of dew drops on rose petals, the coolness of warm summer mornings, the soft chill of warm summer nights, remind me of beauty, when birds sing from tree to tree, when the sun sets in golden pink fire burning in the west, you remind me of beauty, In sleepy dreams, dreaming warm dreams, surealist paint affection with spatter across the sky, you remind me of beauty.

'down of the upside'

Here is something that I wrote about acouple months ago. It was out of the blue then i started thinking about playing with fire and redemption kind of stuff.


Journal entry #1

Set fire my darling, set it on my soul,
Kill the germs and place it stern,
Because I can’t live this way much longer,
If, I rather fry then go on killing my self,
Deeper and deeper, I go
Dark and Dirty and Down I go,
I hit the ground; I hit the ground hard,
Splatter my entrails and poof I’m gone,
Set fire my darling, set it on my soul,
I have nothing no more and I could have it all,
One slip of it and there I go
Dark and Dirty and Down I go,
Peace be with you,
And the pleasure’s all mine
To see you once again,
Those pretty eyes of brown and beautiful face of gold,
Sorry to leave such a mess I go
Dark and Dirty and Down I go,
I slip my shoes on
And fix my hair
Please be sure to take care
Because where I’m going
I’ll be the last one there,
So here I go
Dark and Dirty and Down I go.

one way or another...

this poem came to me in the beganning of the month. one night i was watching Donnie Darko and that guy with the program that polarizes emotion into love and fear. all the idiots that believe that junk crack me up. after that, I thought about fearing love and the next morning this poem came while i was getting ready for work. here it is:

Thank thee for nigh love

On my bloody knees at the dawn of mourning,
Can you for give a dead man?
The rose wilts in hand as tears pelt the petals,
The tears forever wails on my heart,
My heart thrashed out of my chest,
I merely wanted to love,
Cover the hole with my hand,
The lost one is gone.

Took piece of my heart out but for her,
I hope she got’em because I have none left,
Tears fall in the twilight of dreams and waking morning light,
The day presses on with enmity on my shoulders,
The ghost of a man walks around pretending to be me,
Going on through routine without fugue & fuse.

Gone is her love,
Never have I seen it,
Never have I felt it,
But a slab of meat,
I have ripped out my bleeding love for her for her love,
Beaten and tired,
The pursuit of love creased,
For I known only relics.



The poem feels unfinished want I come up with one more stanza.

After reading it a couple times over, I'm not moved by it any more. I don't feel the same. but still good words usage. i think.

my readings

I started reading the introduction for Othello. I remember the movie, O, and I did watch the old silent black and white film, too. I wonder if they are people like that... that have hatered for there fellow man.
I used to have dreams about snakes. They haunted me for years. I wonder if was because of killing a snake when I was kid of 12. I mentioned it once to someone in my english class at unm-g. They told me that if they bite you in your dream that someone close to you would hurt you, some you love. I did. I was biten in the throat in one dream and other times the snakes would be frozen and I would play among them and other strange things about snakes. I take it that my dreams were telling me my future. people would become snake and try to hurt me but they couldn't. but one would.
I have writen a poem about being hurt and hurting and love is anx. to me it is a celebration of love and triumph in a dark way. I will post it soon along with some other poems for the coming V-day holiday.

these days

Sun beams off the snowy blanketed land, We trudge throught the landscape with guns in hand. Following the leader in a single file, the five of us illegally hunting for game down in the valley near a wooded mountian range. We don't travel far from the snow-packed road. the snow is up to our knees even higher in someplaces. A breeze combs through the forest brushing lightly the soft snow off the branches. I follow behind the third person with an ak-47 in hand, I carry a pump-action 12 gage shot-gun, and the thrid person a 40mm hand gun in his trousers. The leader wore winter camoflage made for hunters and the rest of us were blundled up in normal clothes. Trailing behide me are two boys. We milly about for an hour or so following each other through the deep snow. We found deer tracks under the trees and started heading out toward the mountian side. We stop and headed back to the deer tracks to shave off some time and spotted a few horses. The leader lead us toward the horses to see if they might have some deer around them. None were around. The two kids started to goof a round so they were pushed in the ditch. They laughed all the way down. By that time we were worn out and decided to get the boys back. We back tracked ourselves to the car. A half day spent trail brazing through snowy forest floor, just we walk away.

its beganning to look a lot like christmas

I finally got out of the house and walked to work the other day. On the way back home. the cold air feel good against my face. Over the weekend the show fell like a soft blanket. the blankets accumilated ove the two days. now its slowing down. I woke up nice early today to enjoy this snow day. I travel to crytals to check on Razor. We hit a four foot snow drift on the road so shane, hondo, and i dug around for a few hours. I kept mentioning my board and that is good snowboarding wealther but i stop my self. for I sold my snowboard this past year. because i thought the wealther wouldn't be at anything great this year. but i was wrong. now i kick myself.

let it snow, let it snow...

one day I spent it on the south end of the bowl. people weren't able to reach this side because it was a quarter mile away from the highway and when the wealther warmed up a pool of slush formed in between. but this time it still was cool and the snow was fresh and crisp. not a soul had touch this end. I hiked up the slope and found jagged rocks covered up in three and a half feet of snow. I spent a half an hour climbing through the snow to reach the edge of the tree line. I rested. I look for the highness part of the slope at the treeline and start climbing. the open hill side isn't at all big enough, only a quarter of the slope is free of trees. the top three fourths is covered with pine and aspin. that's how the rest of the bowl is like, the top edge is wooded and the bottom is a open meadows and gentle slopes. the hill side I'm climbing has a good steep grade but a hell of climb to the top treeline. I ready my self and strap on the board... and a way i go.